#Film Avengers: Age of Ultron

landscape-1429550012-avengers-2-age-of-ultronIs it not weird that we are taking everything for granted, in a blink of an eye? 4 years ago we could not even imagine to see one of the two most popular super-heroes kicking each other’s ass as mainstream entertainment; now we’re watching a promotional Iron Man and Hulk punch out contest on our tiny little phones (it was only a little bit extended in the film) and bicker about Batman and Superman cynically. Yeah, we are sooo taking everything for granted that Avengers: Age of Ultron feels… We already have watched the entire damn thing at least a dozen times.

This was my first criticism as soon as the post credits began to roll and my friends were like “you really should not have watched every promotion, every trailer and read every news”. But what I am trying to say is that the genre fatigue is setting in; comic book adaptations are on a 4-films-a-year basis and this, as the admiral ship, should have offered something more different.

This is an action movie which I had more fun with dialogues. Joss Whedon’s uncanny ability to write an ensemble shines so well that when they are in a room talking about stuff it is far more enjoyable than anything in Michael Bay territory of blowing CGI shit up everywhere. The one-liners and banters are priceless. However, they make you feel like there are not any stakes because even if a fucking moon sized meteor was coming to earth in a rush, you are sure first one who sees it is going to make a joke about it. Then again I am not bashing the film because of the less risk they have taken this time around. Ultron is a good villain and his sarcastic tone throughout the film really makes you want to hear him more even if you were baffled like “waitaminute, why is he a bad robot now?” since he was rushing to become Terminator just mere seconds after he was born. Dealing with raw emotions is harder for this generation’s robots I guess.

Uh, and I was expecting something less systematic. Comic book nerds know where Wakanda is, nerds also knew Gollum is playing the Klaw and Black Panther’s main baddie is revealed as a plot point in this film but we already knew everything and showing the gems in a dream sequence at this point is not throwing us a bone here. Heroes trying to do heroic thing and trying to save all civilians in this godforsaken Russian city is a neat thing to watch but all internets are trying to win upper hand with “we Marvel love our citizens and try to save them from harm. Superman did not in Man of Steel. Hehe.” Come on. It is easier when there is a dozen of you to save civilians while Thor or Vision is in punching contest with Ultron.

Nothing was ever surprising, except Hawkeye has a family and he does not want to bang Scarlett’s Black Widow. Were they not flirting in the first film, so much that there was a speculation of a Black Widow & Hawkeye film? Nope, this is not the case from now on, because Black Widow is AUNTIE NAT. Hawkeye’s poor little pregnant wife with two children does not bat an eye when he stops by at the house to get some more arrows because there are ten more robots (out of two thousand) that he can kill. She’s not jealous of the hottest Russian girl hanging around too. Best wife ever!

As for other heroes; poor Captain America is a side character who is throwing his bike to people and generally being sad about his forever-alone status. Also, Black Widow was flirting with him in his last solo film but now he has to give advice to Hulk because no one wants to bang Black Widow. HULK FLY AWAY NOT TO BANG BLACK WIDOW!! REDHEAD RUSSIAN MAKES HULK UNCOMFORTABLE! Better Olsen was hot even with a horrible Russian accent. Quicksilver was just there to run around without any real impact. (Also, we have seen before our eyes that X-Men: Days of Future Past Quicksilver scene cannot be improved. If you wanna see it (again?) here’s the link). By the way, did not Iron Man quit being Iron Man at the end of Iron Man 3? When did he build a very shiny (but very same) armor for the 43rd time? (This is not a joke, the suit is literally called Mark XLIII)

The sad thing is, now Whedon is tapped out and the following Avengers films will end up with even more CGI and action and space fighting and more characters from every single film ever and the glue, the heart and basically ERRYYTHING, especially the good dialogue and characterizations will not be there. Eh, maybe one or two real Avengers will die next time to prove the next villain is somewhat a threat.

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